with cherry on top

Confused

2011-04-24T23:42:00.001+08:00

It's like A levels period all over again. Neglected, yep that's what i'm feeling right now. But truth is, i totally understand that weekends are spent for his family and tryna recover from the 'torture' he had over the week in camp. And i'm not asking to meet or call. I just want you to text me before you go to bed. Is that too much to ask?

People tell me to be strong or just leave him, i don't know why the fuck i can't. I swear i feel like i'm the stupidest loser on Earth to still stay and go through this nightmare. I always thought i would feel numb, but at the end of the day i feel so miserable. I still care for this person who makes me sad all the time. Why bother? I don't know.

I DON'T KNOW WHY I STILL LOVE THIS GUY.
I DON'T KNOW WHY I'M STILL HERE.

I don't know why my feelings for you arent fading eventhough you've made me go through so much pain.

The last time you called... 20 days ago..

Till we meet again

2011-04-17T23:41:00.006+08:00

SCHOOL'S HERE BITCHEZXZZCZFSZXFSD!

And i'm not looking forward to it. My modules sound so dry this time. And i really hope my facis are friendly and easy to get along with. Or else, 15 weeks of doom. Doom i tell ya, Doom! And to a certain someone who is entering a new phase in NS, all the best and take care! Since school's here, i've kinda lost the mojo to blog already. Okay, i'm off to read Chocolate Run till i sleep. Goodnight.

Ps; Youre a totally changed person. Not for the best though. And it sucks to know the ugly truth. All this while, i'm just pretending that it will be okay eventhough it's not. Baby, youre a totally changed person.

You go down, down, down
I fall out of love with you
Come back round, round, round
You sun of a gun

Something

2011-04-15T18:22:00.008+08:00

This is what's bothering me.

This is one of the reasons why i don't like to hang out with girls.Well not the sixteens, theyre different okay. Don't ask me how different. Anyway, all they can talk about are how good and loving their boyfriends are. Their boyfriends did this, did that. I'm not saying my boyfriend is that bad but seriously? Is that that the only thing you girls can talk about? I love you girls but please, can we talk about what we wanna do when we grow up or i dont know, SOMETHING ELSE! There's a reason why i don't want to go for this date thing and i really don't want to talk about it. So i really hope you would just stop it when i say No, i don't want to and i don't mind you girls going off without me. So please, don't force me. Now i don't have the mood to meet you girls already cause i know for sure the first thing you girls will ask me is about that date. I really wished you girls can read my mind. Wouldnt that be easier?

So anyway some have asked why i hang out with Syazni more than my boyfriend. Hah! Truth is, if my boyfriend has the time i would love to hang out with him. I don't know just sit down and have ice cream would be really nice. He's busy with god knows what and he's not even talking to me. I don't know what i did. Don't get me wrong, i'm not into syazni neither he's into me. Hahahah that's just wtf. We are just good friends. We meet when we have the time. I mean, apart from my boyfriend he's the second person whom i'm comfortable with. He's like a brother from another sexy mother. That's the thing, we don't talk about boyfriends or girlfriends whenever we meet. Okay so sometimes we talk about pretty girls hehe. It's nice to talk to somebody about what we wanna do in a few years time, that kinda thing yknow. I really wished people would just stop asking me things like this. Sigh
Goodbye.

Ps; I CANT WAIT FOR MY CLOTHES TO ARRIVE HEHEHEHE YAYAYAYAYAY!

Nice to meet you

2011-04-13T20:37:00.009+08:00

The only picture i took (without him noticing)
We finally meet but for some reason, i kinda felt guilty. It's like i'm troubling him or something :/ Oh well, it's nice to finally see you. Botak, like cool yo haha. And i wish you all the best for the interview at SMU tomorrow! I hope you nail it! And eventhough the next time we meet will be like what, two more months, six more or maybe next year, i'll always pray for your well-being. Have fun with your family and friends before you leave for idk where you'll be posted to. Take care!

Jauh di otak, dekat di hati
(If it doesnt mean anything to you then oh wellz ♥)

Sorry, but i'm no hardcore

2011-04-11T22:08:00.003+08:00

A day out with the usuals. The second picture is hilarious. Little Amin couldnt reach so he had to put his leg on the table. If possible, he wants to sit/lie on it. Imagine this dude in NS. Nah, i can't. Haha. All those thoughts and sad feelings aside, i had fun. Thank you

Now i feel.....

Conflicted

2011-04-10T00:34:00.009+08:00

Wow. I wanted to let out what i feel in this blog but just as i was about to create a new post, my mind just stopped thinking. I know, it's impossible right that your mind just stopped thinking. Or can it? Well the whole purpose to blog tonight was to let out some stuff (a way to cheer myself up) that has been bothering me all day long but i can't seem to type what i've been thinking. Tsk.

One thing's for sure, i miss this particular person. So much. We've not talked for days now and i should understand why but, i'm just afraid that this is going to go on. And if this continues, sigh...
I just miss him :'( But..

Anw btw, look what i've found from http://twitter.com/#!/WonderQuotes
"Prince Charming? Nah.. I got myself a Soldier!"
Haha cool! Cause yknow, he's in Army, a soldier. You get what i mean right

Gosh, where are you! I don't see you making any effort at all!

Trying to catch up but time was too fast

2011-04-07T00:35:00.002+08:00

Was watching Chick Vs. Dick Ep69 The Stiletto-Mascara Challenge and got reminded of this particular dude who has very long eyelashes (which will sometimes drop whenever he touches it) Hah!

He's gonna POP this weekend. Time flies, so fast. Before you know it, i'll be graduating. Fuck yeah baby. Then Syazni and the rest of the guys will be serving NS. I... can't wait for Syazni to serve NS actually. I can't wait to see that look on his face when the time to serve NS comes and his Oh very precious hair is gone. But don't worry Syaz, you might look like Wentworth Miller...

NOT!

I'm not excited about graduating. Not now maybe

Denim Shirts

2011-04-06T21:07:00.003+08:00

Headed down to Haji Lane to look for some printed tees but it wasn't what Syazni wanted so we went to Zamzam for an early dinner. Soon after, Arief joined us. Today was really exhausting. FYP meeting in the morning wasnt as productive as i thought it would be. Was really a waste of time. So there'll be more work next week. Oy vey

Anyone in need of a soulmate now? Call this number now 900-Kiss-Me

Instagram

2011-04-05T19:23:00.004+08:00

Oh yes, trying out my Instagram. Im new to this app and i must say, that this app is totally cool. Haha! Well the last picture wasnt edited at all. Just trying to capture Syazni in mid air. Not that bad, but of course the quality is not perfect since i'm using the phone's camera.

We walked from Downtown East to Elias, via the park. It took like an hour? Well pretty much enjoyed the sunset, the jokes and bittersweet stories. That long walk in the park definitely brings back a lot of memories.

As for today, spent my whole day at home, lazing around. Yep, i just wanna be lazy before school starts!

70s Summer

2011-04-04T23:28:00.002+08:00

All of these looks are pretty cool huh. Trying to save some money for a pair of decent Timberland Boots but then again, i feel like buying a pair of new heels or Vans OTW. I can't make up my mind! Or maybe i should save the money to go on a spree for clothes. Lots of things in mind but short of cash. Bummer

Pictures taken from Asos.com

Well what do you miss?

2011-03-28T01:50:00.000+08:00

I'm still figuring out what my heart really wants and whatever decisions i've made, i really hope it's leading me to the right path. I'm too tired of these sleepless nights. They say, when you have something bothering you, just sleep it off and it will go away. Well, it doesn't work actually. You feel worse when you wake up.

A vintage exterior

2011-03-24T00:56:00.002+08:00

Growing up

2011-03-17T00:26:00.004+08:00

I miss this someone, alot. So much. I don't have the guts to tell him how i really feel, so i hope by blogging it out, i will feel better. Well, i have not met him for weeks, have not listened to his almost gone voice for days. All i get now is a text. I'm not sure what he's busy with or maybe he's just lazy or too tired, but let's just think positive okay haha. I hope he's safe and healthy! I'll always pray for your well-being ♥

Anyhoo, as you all know i'm head over heels with.. of course Joe. Haha! Now he is on the cover of Details Magazine and i swear my jaw nearly dropped and my heart skipped so many beats! Hahaha! Damn Joe, why are you so hot?! With that facial hair and new haircut.. Can i just marry you now? Hahah! Kidding. I'm not chasing after looks.. Well okay let's be honest. We all want the heart and the looks right? Haha. Okay so my point is, Joe is all grown up. Just like fadhil :') I remembered rushing to 7-11 two years ago just to get a copy of Teenage because he is on the cover (with his brothers). I'm pretty sure i still have their poster, probably stashed somewhere in my wardrobe. Joe had this long hair and now, Oh so manly. Check this out! http://www.cambio.com/news/joe-jonas-in-details-magazine-i-m-growing-up

Well, i still love you for who you are, F. Even botak now i'm sure you still look good :) And to syazni, fuck what they say. You still have other friends who care for you. I know you well buddy, if you tease me, i'll just bully you to the core hahaha. Alright, goodnight world.

Being Nineteen

2011-03-10T01:02:00.007+08:00

I was bloghopping the other day and this blogger said something about what's it like to be nineteen and i totally understand how she feels. I mean, wow i'm already nineteen. Cause honestly, i don't feel like one. I feel like i'm still sixteen or something. Okay well apart from being small sized tsk, i still can't believe that this is gonna be my last year of being a teenager. It's like i still have lots of things to do before i really reach the 'adult' stage. You get what i mean people?

And i'm sick. The awesomest way to start my birthday! I refused to take any medication but i was too weak, so i had to pop in some panadols. Bummer

Anyhoo, i was really hoping you called or just text you know.. eventhough i know you couldnt. Was hoping for some kind of miracle or something. I miss you dude.

...

My nineteenth birthday didnt start out pretty well since i was sick and was too weak to walk around. Then shafiq had to add on by texting crap in the morning haha. But that didnt stop me from going out to meet my friends! Met up with the girls for lunch and they surprised me with a gift from bodyshop. Luvvvvv it! Afterwards, met up with syazni! He treated me mudpie, well as a birthday cake then we head down to asli village and met up with the guys! Had satay and then coincidentally, taufiq gave us free pizza! How awesome is that! Food, food and more food!

Alright, i would like to thank you all for the wishes, my lovely girls for the treat and that wonderful gift, syazni for CC and satay. Youre awesome though you are annoying sometimes. Well... actually most of the time haha. And my parents for that fuckingawetasticshizz present! It's mine now! Woopee! Hehe.

Well i had a great day, except for this one person who had to ruin my night. Well, i've got other better things to think about. Seriously dude, i've never ever thought that you would say such a thing. Especially, when you are already attached! Woah. I guess all guys are the same.

Photos will be up soon!

THANKS GUYS FOR MAKING MY NINETEENTH BIRTHDAY A MEMORABLE ONE!

Love you guys!

Congratulations

2011-03-05T02:19:00.008+08:00

To raurau and boyfriend for getting good grades for their A levels. Alhamdullilah. Allah listens to our prayers :) Insyaallah, you guys get to enter the uni that you want. Amin.

What if..

2011-03-04T01:35:00.010+08:00

Yep, i'm still awake.

Was just wishing people birthday stuff and all then i realised, hah! Mine's next week? I don't wanna be excited about it cause well, you tend to expect something so no. I don't want to get too excited. Damn right i miss that whole fun wonderful atmosphere while i celebrated my 17th birthday. I miss those people and, i miss the lasagne haha. Speaking of which, i should get some lasagne tmr! Haha. I keep praying that i'm on the right path. I mean, i don't wanna go through a series of heartbreaks and miseries again. Too much for me. Even though i know Allah will not give you challenges in life that you will not be able to handle. Cey hehe. But seriously, please tell me i'm on the right path! I sulk all day, thinking about the things that i should have done, should have said.. Life just keeps getting better aye.

You know.. Sometimes i wished i could read your mind or even predict the future.

NS?

2011-02-16T23:33:00.005+08:00

Am suppose to go to bed and wake up super early tmr to continue my revision but i think for now, i'm sick of Pharmaco & Toxicology. I'm seeing drug names, classifications, animations.....

So, i googled NS and this appeared. I was expecting some NS men crawling or something haha! Well, these shoes look kinda cool. Oh it's Supra. I was thinking of getting a pair of Supra yknow, just to add a new brand in my shoes collection haha but then again, i've heard these are Matrep's kind of shoes. Hahah ah what the heck? As long as i don't look minahrep-ish with these shoes, it's fine.

Okay so anyway, i was on the phone with boyfriend just now. Well he has been complaining a lot about life in Tekong. Hahah all these while, i could not help but to control my laughter everytime he complains. Before entering, he was so stoked about NS. Now, he wants to go home. Poor baby hahaha. IN YOUR FACE, SUCKA! Hehehe. Better take care of your 'isteri' ah! All these stories, i'm glad that i'm a girl hehs. All these NS shizz, it sure looks like helluva fun cause it's like you have personal trainers to train you, endless exercise and free food! Hahah! But then, it's pure torture. Haha oh well, you'll get your bed in 8 days time okay. Take care. Now, i'm gonna revise a lil bit more and off to bed. Goodnight

...

I love it when you call. Even though it's less than 10 mins. Appreciate the effort ♥

Gahhh i really wished you know how i feel. I have a lot to say but i can't seem to put it in proper words to let you know.

2011-02-08T20:35:00.016+08:00

On hiatus?

Boyfriend is soon to be botak and enlisting tomorrow
UT3 is just next week
After that is the ho ho holidays (Oh, i'm not really looking forward to the holidays)
Uncle's engagement this Sunday
Removing my braces
Im gonna turn nineteen
Cest La Vie on the 12th of March
And probably meetups with my buddies

Anyone knows of any good syarahan?

So anyway, I don't have the mojo to blog anymore. Well at least not now. You can just check my facebook or twitter (Kind of active) for updates.

...

I'm disappointed in you. I've got lots of things to say but time is really not on our side. So i guess maybe i should just keep quiet and tell you when we meet or talk again. I miss you. Not because that we've not met for a long time. I just miss that 'thing' that we used to have. It makes us happy, really really happy. So look at those pictures, and reminisce those times we had, even those little things, don't you miss it too?

I pray that you'll always be safe and healthy, with your family by your side. Don't forget those who has helped you and don't let your ego lead your mind. Wherever you are, take care ♥

#lovefact If someone truly wants you, nothing will keep them away. They will do everything they can to be with you. #TLS

...

10 Feb; Shits happen

I'm waiting for the lesson to start and many things are circling in my mind. How time flies, just a month more to my nineteenth. Wow! This has got me thinking, What do i really want? I'm always pleasing people, trying to fit in and all and at the end of the day, i'm always left with hurt. Well gotta brush that feeling off. I'm not gonna give a fuck about what people say.

Had a long talk with Khai yesterday, for the very first time haha. It was really nice, it's like i've finally let out everything off my chest. And he shared some things that has been bothering him. We talked about relationships, what it's like to be a teenager, our dreams, families, travelling and amin's grandmother who apparently, is keeping 'something'. Haha. Come to think about it, i've never had any serious talk with my own boyfriend. Don't you think so fadhil? I think it's kinda bad? I kinda know what you want to do and what you want, do you know what i want? Hmm. But nevertheless, i'll always support your decision!

So anyway, after that long talk i felt better and and and i should not be pulled down easily! I know i'm not this always-sad-dying-fuckedup-wanting-to-kill-people-allthetime girl haha! I have big dreams too. Insyaallah, i'm strong enough to face all the obstacles in life.

And boyfriend, IF you are reading this. Hey i hope you are fine. I know that Cheryl Cole doesnt want you anymore cause you are botak! Hahahahaha. She told me yesterday, on the phone. She is just pretending that she likes you. She likes some other guy whom we don't know who has more hair. So don't bother looking for her okay. Don't be sad, there are other fishes in the sea. Hahahaha. Yeaaa my boyfriend (banyak) perasan. Anyway, take good care of yourself. Train hard and be safe. Don't let people steal your things hahaha. Well have fun!

2011-01-27T21:15:00.008+08:00

Cheryl Cole and her pink heels

Partialled school today (last okay, last) to meet him.

After 1346373272 days of not meeting, finally! A day well spent plus the exhaustion of walking around City Hall makes it all worthwhile, i think hahah. *Walks pass a mirror* "Eh lelaki tu macam handsome eh" And another 43578265918264198641 more days till we meet again since he will be flying off to Dubai next week and then NS in 13 days time. How time flies, sigh.

(When he was in sec 1 or 2? Freaking small haha)

It was just yesterday that i met you in your Siglap Uniform. Hahah! Cheyyy hahaha.

Oh well, time to grow up. I hate this, can i just be eighteen? I don't want more responsibilities :( Turning nineteen pretty soon sigh. And school is just bleargh these days. Gotta endure a week more or so, let's go!

Take care and have fun ♥

Luvvvvvvsxzx

2011-01-22T14:51:00.006+08:00

Look at the stars, look at how they shine for you

It would be nice to own one of this. Gonna find one hehe.

Okay so saturday is here! This week has been annoying, i have no idea why. Guess it's because of the facilitators in school and some people who think they are so great. Been keeping mum about all this, don't push the wrong button or else things will get pretty ugly.

Chey

Hahaha, i won't make things ugly, i'll prolly curse them silently and hope they get what they deserve. Especially those who think that they are always right. And to this particular person, can you please let him do what he wants to do? Can you not psycho him? Thanks. And look at what i've found! HAHAHA, This picture is so so old. Damn

Well anyway, happy belated 27th!

Fadhil, you suck! But still, ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

2011-01-17T14:05:00.009+08:00

With you right here, i'm a rocketeer, let's fly

Where we go, we don't need roads

Where we stop, nobody knows

To the stars if you really want it

Got, get a jetpack with your name on it

Above the clouds in the atmosphere

Just say the words and we outta here

Hold my hand, if you feelin' scared

We flyin' up, outta here

Here we go, come with me

There's a world out there that we should see

...

Look at what i did! Hahahaha! Fadhil's (Or Joe's) doppleganger. They somehow look alike okay. Well maybe not much similarities here, shall find other pictures then. But still... ♥

"What am I afraid of? I’m afraid of not having enough time to right the wrongs I’ve made. Of not having enough time to prove everyone wrong about me. Not having enough time to really live my life like I want to live it. And I’m terrified of not having enough time to find the one I love."

2011-01-16T17:34:00.005+08:00

Keep on going

When one problem's solved, the other one comes along. And you try hard not to give a fuck about it, but at the end of the day it stops you from sleeping. Well i guess sleeping might be helpful, but i'll always wake up feeling sour. Suckity suck. My anger is at it's topmost peak. Been tolerating people's shit for far too long. It's time for me to throw my shit at those people!

Well on a brighter note, got myself a baseball jacket yesterday. And indulged myself at CC.

Mudpie madness ♥

Gotta cheer myself up since boyfriend got 'married' yesterday hahahaha! Oh boy, just a few more weeks and he's off to NS. I think i should sign up for NS as well, Not. NS would be the last thing i wanna do... Well never!

2011-01-12T19:23:00.007+08:00

When you're drunk and free

Not.

One of those what-the-fvck-are-you-tryna-do-?! moments. Pictures were taken when our plan to surprise amin for his belated birthday failed, and so i had to eat at the staircase and syazni played around with the camera while waiting for the heavy downpour to stop. Thanks to syazni who didnt wanna call amin first before proceeding with the plan tsk.

Well anyway, ive put up pictures of my handmade accessories on facebook! Go go go check it out! Those are the 'leftovers' from the new year flea. There will be a new collection of accessories coming up, so stay tune! Hehe.

Hoping to meet ze loverboy on saturday :( We are both so busy, we don't have the time to meet anymore. And he's gonna serve the nation pretty soon. Good grief, he's all grown up! I mean, WOW. He was so so selenge back then (still have a picture of him back in secondary 1, prolly gonna upload it soon and do a comparison. Now and back then hahaha) and now with the facial hair all action manly hahahah. He's looking forward to NS, and i should too haha. 'Sapau' okay, 'sapau' :)

There, there he is. My boyfriend hahahahah!

2011-01-09T22:16:00.002+08:00

The Rockshow Part II.

Bridges was awesome! Though im not a fan of this kind of genre but one song, all signs point to lauderdale really makes me want to listen more of ADTR hehe. Well, i was there at the gig to support Syazni. First timer you. Hahaha! A few mistakes here and there but overall, he did a great job! Hoping to see him perform more in the near future.

As for me, i've finally decided which route to choose. This is going to determine my future. Hope all goes well.

2011-01-03T14:26:00.007+08:00

Happy new year!

Let's hope we can survive this year easily, insyaallah. Especially when it's the last year for me which means more work and boyfriend's going away for NS. Sigh, oh well gotta be strong! New year's eve for me was tiring. Had flea at scape and alhamdullilah it was kind of successful! Many of my friends and family members came to support us. Love them so much, terharu i hehe. Hoping to have another flea during chinese new year. The next day, spent my day with the Sixteen! It was legend wait for it... dary! We danced and sang till our throats were sore. I love how that night goes, what an awesome way to start 2011! Sixteen FTW! ♥

Hoping to watch The Tourist this friday and gonna watch Syazni perform on saturday! Woo! Weekends here i come!

2010-12-29T22:00:00.008+08:00

Cousin's Engagement

Alhamdullilah, cousin's engagement went well. Though i was really sad that most of the relatives that i know didnt turn up despite the constant reminder from my uncle. People like these, deserve a really big/long -______________________- expression. Ah that's all i can say of them, can't be bothered. So anyway, cousin is so cute. Haha! Like Kungfu Panda! Oh yea, his engagement falls on the same day as my brother's birthday!

Okay so anyway,

BOYFRIEND IS BACKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK!

We watched Gulliver's Travels this afternoon. We met up just for the movie, well cause he had to rush to his grandparents' place afterwards. Oh well, i'm happy to see him and, i appreciate the effort :') He look so manly with all those facial hair ♥

Freaking busy this whole week. Revision, preparation for the flea, meetups and more meetups. Miss him already, sigh

2010-12-21T16:55:00.009+08:00

Okay so i've told you guys before that there will be a flea soon. So, yea it's at Scape. And also to celebrate the last few moments left before the new year comes.

Last Friday, skipped school and went to USS with the family. Awesome shizz. I thought i was going to faint when i took the Mummy rollercoaster. It was really terrifying, well then again it was fun, that's the only time i get to scream my lungs out. Then on Saturday, headed out to town with Faryal and Syazni.

My new year 'resolutions'

Some of it doesn't even make sense. We just wanted to fill up the space so we wrote down what we want haha.

Ah yes, still 'in love' with JB. Though i must admit some of the Jonas episodes were lame but i just can't take my eyes off Joe. Syazni got a job at Seoul Garden. You know what that means? HAFTA DISTURB HIM! Hahahahaha. Oh it's a busy busy week. Love it! Dental appointment, Cousin's engagement/ Lil bro's birthday, trip to JB :)

Hope his flights won't be delayed. I wanna meet him before school reopens :(

Ps; Happy 26th you ♥

2010-12-13T14:39:00.006+08:00

Saturday was well spent with my chilling buddies and Sunday with family. Awesome weekend. Even got myself a new pair of Vans! Looking forward to the school holidays! Gonna be busy with preparing stuff for the flea. Will update more about the flea alright.

I have this sudden urge to delete this blog and create a new one. Well since 2011 is here. A new year, for new things hahaha. Okay whatever, will think about it. As for now, i'm hoping time would fly a lil bit faster so that i can have my early dinner with syazni.

Ps; Check out these two rings! Selling at $7 only! Only by meet-up!

http://classique-redbow.weebly.com/-the-latest-rings.html

2010-12-08T19:12:00.004+08:00

Boyfriend's flying off to the Europe side with his family tmr night. I miss him already :( But i've gotta stay strong! Focus on my UT2. Argh who am i kidding? UT2?! Please. Let me enjoy my december holidays first okay. I am gonna make myself busy by chilling out with friends, maybe have a flea or something.. so that i won't have to miss him that badly aye? Haha. He will return either the end of december or next year. *Prays hard and hope that his dad won't extend the trip* HAHAH!

Oh well, happy holidays everyone!

Hope that he reaches Europe and return back to Singapore safely. Love ya ♥

xoxo

2010-12-01T23:18:00.003+08:00

Our small boy has finally turned eighteen. Our surprise was a success! Hehe. I had a great time, with great people around. I hope he enjoyed our mini celebration and the 'egg treatment' afterwards. Well boy, we did that for your own good *evil smile* Hahaha. And for god's sakes, Cut your freaking fringe!

Have a goodnight sleep all ♥

2010-11-28T01:36:00.004+08:00

(So.. last year)

Boyfriend's done with Alevels and i'm done with UT1 and PP Presentation! Ah love this moment. Well sadly he's going overseas for weeks next week. By then, it's my December holidays already. Sigh. Oh wells, gotta start preparing what to do for the holidays! Hehehe

2010-11-10T21:04:00.008+08:00

All the best to those taking A levels! (I know, i'm two days late)

And to boyfriend,

JIAYOU FADHIL! ♥

Well UTs are here too, just had pharmaco today. It was pretty okay. Analytical next, not cool yo.

Year 2 Sem 2's modules are so draggy. I really can't wait for this sem to end. Well, i really can't wait to get my diploma! Driving license next hehe.

I better do my RJ now. Goodnight

Ps; OMG, FIVE MORE MONTHS TILL MY 19th HEHE.

...

The sweetest episode evaaa :') Watching Fated To Love You again because i can't resist admiring Ethan Ruan haha. I keep smiling throughout the whole episode hehe, Who doesnt want to marry a rich, good-looking, (Plus thick eyebrows) romantic man who is willing to take you as his wife eventhough youre infertile?! Sadly, this is just a story boooo.

2010-10-24T00:51:00.005+08:00

After so many donkey years

Okay well since primary school

I finally met Dee. Spent my Saturrrrrrday with this mamat

Was suppose to complete my report but Coffee Bean was being sucha bitch. Couldnt surf the net. So we watched Love at First Hiccup instead. Damn boy, you were so eager to watch the you know what scene tsk tsk.

See you again someday, maybe next year haha! ♥

730 days ♥

2010-10-21T19:11:00.001+08:00

Happy 2nd Anniversary Faddddh.

English O level eh hahaha

With lots of love,

Ayeen ♥

:')

2010-08-16T11:00:00.001+08:00

Sometimes, when things between us are going so bad and I want to give up on you, I remember how you never once gave up on me. And so I hold on a little tighter, and pray to God that everything will be okay soon. I need to know that this pain will all be worth it in the end.

Liberty Walk

2010-08-15T14:41:00.004+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOE!

(Totally in love with this picture)

...

Here's to all the boys tryin to hold you back

Tryin to make you fell like your less than that

Got nothing more better than to make you crack

But really just tryin to put your dreams off track

And you know in the end it'll be okay

Cause all that really matters are the steps you take

And everything else falls into place

There's no price to pay, I say

It's a liberty walk, walk say goodbye to the

People who tied you up

It's a liberty walk, walk

Feeling your heart again, breathing new oxygen

It's a liberty walk, walk free yourself, slam the door

Not a prisoner anymore

LMH

2010-08-14T15:40:00.003+08:00

Now ive realised.. that i post too many pictures of fadhil haha!

What about Lee Min Ho?

Open up

2010-08-10T21:21:00.007+08:00

(I so... need new pictures of us tch.)

Everything in life is temporary, because everything changes. It takes great courage to love someone knowing it might end sooner or later but having faith that it will last forever ♥

MY ARAB BABY IS EIGHTEEN!

2010-08-08T15:27:00.004+08:00

HAPPY EIGHTEENTH ARAB!

Woo. Time flies, so fast. And soon it'll be your prelims and my UT3 and then your A levels and i'll be starting my new semester. So anyway, my dear arab boy has turned eighteen. Okay youre no longer a boy. Young man Hahahahaha! Enjoy your day, relax for awhile before you start your hardcore mugging for the prelims. If you can do well for your midyears, fuck yeah you can make it through prelims and do even better for A levels! I dont mind if we don't get to meet, go and study hard/smart whatever. WOO LOVE YA SEXY!

Time to work my ass off too. Goodbye

Eyes glistened with happiness

2010-08-04T18:15:00.003+08:00

This boy here is turning Eighteen soon

So because of our hectic schedule, i made some plans to celebrate his birthday in parts haha!

First was a tee

Second, was a trip to Ice Cream Chefs (since he's a big fan of ice cream)

And a few more parts

The ice cream there's nice and the price is not bad haha. Anyhoo, don't quite like the service there hahaha i mean, c'mon people! We are first timers, don't give me that stupid expression of yours. You should be assisting us! Tsk

Oh well, as long boyfriend likes the ice cream, i'm happy. I know it was a bit rushing but i hope you like what i did. Happy birthday in advance. And oh, not to forget Fai and Zahid for driving us there. This plan wouldnt work without you guys. Thank you so much

Make me a better one

2010-08-02T23:50:00.005+08:00

I feel like letting out some stuff here.

Im just not happy with myself. They say, youve gotta love yourself first before you can love someone else. But... I just don't feel it. Im not happy with what i did for the past years. Mixed with the wrong kind of companions and i was too naive. That, made me what i am today; a freak who is paranoid with almost everything. When someone says a lil sarcasm and i feel offended as if, he/she is cursing my parents. Yknow.. that kind of stuff. So sensitive. Whenever my boyfriend says something in a 'harsh' manner (i mean, pfft he's alr like that!) i will either feel so scared or mad. Mad at him for not saying nicely.

And i think too much. Think too much of what people will say about me.

And, i always have this guilty feeling whenever i let out my true feelings to someone (yea especially to the boyfriend) I mean, i prefer having a relationship that is open. Though the truth's gonna hurt, i will try to get over it sooner or later. Not hide it from me and i have to ask a lot of questions till he opens up. Just not my kinda thing. Although i was saying the truth, i will feel guilty cause i'm afraid of hurting him, other people. Although.. although to someone whom i don't like at all, i will feel guilty as well. It's just stupid.

I used to be a cheerful girl. Very optimistic

These years have been torturing (though there were sweet, awesome moments with friends, family and him) I will be sucha pessimist. It's like there's nothing positive to think about in life now (complete and utter bullshit) tsk, im still trying my very best to be optimistic.

And again, ive issues with my body. I used to be insecure about my body because of my rashes back in primary and secondary school. Now when im in poly, people will just comment on how skinny i am and how much weight i need to gain. It's annoying. Oh hoh, i wished i was fair. Fair like boyfriend's sister? Fair like SNSD? -.-" Fair like Lee? Fair like Jessica Alba? Just.. fairer. (Need to become like MJ now)

I know i need to appreciate my body because, others who are not normal would die to have a body like you and mine because ours are alr 'perfect' to them. But please, stop telling me how skinny i look and stuff like that. Ive been trying hard to gain weight now. So demoralising yknow!

And for your information, exercising helps to gain weight too!

Future? I can see what i will be working as in the years to come. First thing to buy with all of my savings; maybe a car? I know mini is too expensive for a first car. But who knows? Heh heh.

My awesome friends, thanks for being there for me. My sexy; Happy Birthday in advance! Hehe. Meet me on Weds please ♥

Been wondering

2010-08-02T22:56:00.004+08:00

16897.) sometimes i wish i could go to the hospital, just to see if you would visit me. other times i want to run away, but just far enough that you’d miss me.

Friends

2010-08-01T22:05:00.002+08:00

Central and Sticky sweets

Happy birthday, the last one on the shelf

Burger king and laughter

If only boyfriend were there

Aching neck

2010-07-30T22:37:00.004+08:00

I have an aching neck

and im left with RJ to complete

The question is really stupid

And im finding ways to bullshit

Scottz lip, your method of presentation during meeting three is... not effective.

Your name's cool though

Coffee Bean

2010-07-29T20:44:00.004+08:00

Met up with Lee and she gave me this awesome necklace bought from Melbourne uh huh uh huh, it's freaking nice. Thanks babe!

And i got back my laptop and got it configured as well,
IM A HAPPY GIRL TODAY

Though im missing someone right now but oh well, ive gotta stop thinking about others and start thinking about myself!

A penny for your thoughs

2010-07-27T23:00:00.005+08:00

No school tomorrow so i plan to stay up late tonight and study
And that if, i can stay awake

A few more weeks and it's the holidays

Oh yea, i can hear 'em screaming my name

but when the holidays come, i think id rather go to school cause when i'm in school, all i'll worry about are my grades. Not anything or anyone else

I'll try to make use of this 3 weeks by studying for UT3 and yes of course, eat more. It's really getting on my nerves when people KEEP SAYING IM SKINNY! Yes, i know i'm skinny but seriously do you have to tell me that everyday? Shutup and walk away okay. I'm not anorexic (to those who said i am) cause ive never ever tried starving myself just to look skinny. It's stupid. And there's this girl in my class who claims that she is fat when she is not! She is freaking thin! Im 'fatter' than her! Well cause my thighs are bigger than her! I feel like slapping her face whenever she says "Im fat" with that act cute voice. How skinny you want? Tsktsk. Okay fine if she keeps saying that, but please don't compare my legs to your legs okay? I'm pretty sure mine are bigger than yours. So please, zip it.

Anyhoo, im actually quite happy that my weekends are fully booked. I just hope that there are no last minute changes.

I miss twitter. I miss tweetdeck. I miss those tweets, appearing one by one at the bottom corner of my screen.

Because my Fujitsu laptop's a bitch. It's like i have to send it for repair every three months. It is so annoying gila! All of my movies, my favourite songs... gone. Just like that. All 25 episodes (Is it 25?) of How I Met Your Mother latest season, gone. I miss 'Im Awesome' Barney Stinson.

"This is gonna be legen wait for it, dary!"

Okay i think, my eyes are telling me to sleep. Gonna wake up tmr morning and start cleaning up the hamsters and then study. It must be a a very fruitful Wednesday okay Ain.

Goodnight all.

If we ever meet again

2010-07-26T19:15:00.005+08:00

Ive planned a few things for this upcoming 'important' day.
I'm just afraid that we don't have the time to meet up
Please oh precious time, please be on our side

He has been really busy
Have not met him for two weeks plus now
It looks like we won't be able to meet for a month or so?
Balls. Well i'm pretty much busy myself too

Im hungry. Goodbye

Lee Min Ho, be mine? Hehe.

2010-07-22T22:13:00.008+08:00

There are some things i just wanna say to my boyfriend also known as, the asshole hahaha.

Thank you for tolerating my nonsense and bitchy fights with ya. Im a pain in the ass, i know. And there are times when you nearly gave up, and you just wanna sleep, tryna forget what i did or said. Im sorry. Youre the bestest friend i ever had, though these few months are kinda rough and youve not been paying attention to me! Hmph! *rolls eyes* Well, i understand. Youre a hardworking man haha, im sure you will get good grades for your A levels. I love you for who you are dude. I know you dont want me to be upset if i were to know youre angry with me but still, i don't like it if you hide your feelings. Tell me what i did wrong okayzszs.

And thanks to Amin, for listening to my whines, complaints, praises/compliments about this asshole and my oh so perasan moments hahahaha.

Oh and thanks to all my lovely ladies for being there for me.

OMG. It's like some grammy awards speech hehs.

Moving on..

Yes i know, i'm abit slow. Ive just finished watching all 16 episodes of Personal Preference!

Hehe, i was so touched by what he did, i printscreened it. Okay girls, say awwwww. I didnt get to printscreen the part when he proposed to her with balloons :( This is by far, the most sweetest Korean drama ive ever watched. *two thumbs up* It made me laugh and cry at the same time. Aigoo, Lee Min Ho is just super adorable. When he smiles, i cannot stop myself from giggling haha!

If only there's this kind of man out there. Yknow.. super sweet and romantic. Even when he's serious, your heart melts. Understanding and always there to comfort you when youre down in the dumps. Makes sure everything will be alright. If only....

Please. Lee Min Ho is just someone whom i fantasize haha (and maybe i'll try to look for him at the airport along with the other fans when he arrives here in Singapore!) but i still admire my boyfriend for always finding ways to be happy... make me happy. I love you Mohamed Fadhil. Meet up soon? :'(

Goodnight.

Only the positive thoughts?

2010-07-19T23:00:00.007+08:00

11 on the dot

Personal Preference; Another way to keep my mind off things
Plus plus, it's Lee Min Ho! How can i Not watch it right girls?

It has been stressful. I swear i feel like doing stupid things

It was like, the worst downslope of my life!

And my hamster looks like its gonna die anytime soon

I think im gonna cry

Boyfriend's been busy too

Have not met him for a week plus now

Prelims soon, so study hard!

I got PP to complete, UT3 to worry about and damn

Module Selection, i don't know which module to choose

The dream of going to Uni after completing my diploma, kinda shattered into pieces

Im.So.Scared

Semester 1 is gonna end soon. That's fast isnt it

Then the fasting month

Boyfriend's gonna face A levels

Busy Busy Busy and, exhausted

Goodbye

Cramping everything

2010-07-11T14:43:00.004+08:00

Mugging the whole day.
And it gets tougher and tougher

Don't disturb me
I might just bite your head off

In your embrace

2010-07-09T22:55:00.003+08:00

araBaby ♥

Brush off those negative thoughts. Make me happy
But it's hard, i keep moving forward
But the past haunts me, the future worries me
I don't wanna regret

I dont want to be in misery

2010-07-07T19:20:00.008+08:00

Baby, ive gotta stop waiting and giving.
And, i love you. 3 more months, please don't screw it up.

Chemistry drained out all of my brain juice and seriously, i don't feel like coming to Chemistry Class tmr. All i want to do is sit in the library and mug for Microbiology/Biochemisty. Plus plus plus! ITS SPAIN VS. GERMANY PEOPLE! It's gonna be exciting! I hope. Haha, should i watch it?

Your salty skin and how
It mixes in with mine
The way it feels to be
Completely intertwined
Not that I didn't care
It's that I didn't know
It's not what I didn't feel,
It's what I didn't show
So let me be
I'll set you free

ps; It was nice to meet you sexylove. Really
Please, please don't make last minute changes
Aww and i get to squeeze your face.. i like...

Run now

2010-07-04T17:38:00.003+08:00

Never give up
...

I know she won't be reading this but let me just vent my anger here okay.
F*CK YOU SLUT! YOURE SO F*CKING CHEAP. YOU REALLY NEED A BIG TIGHT SLAP ON YOUR FACE!
Okay, im done.

Squeeze your face

2010-07-02T14:09:00.005+08:00

After a week plus, i finally get to meet you, i was relieved. If only it was abit longer...

Sexylove

2010-06-30T21:57:00.003+08:00

"No, im not attracted to him. I don't know why. Ask my brain"
Gua lup yuh bro ♥
Please study hard :'(

Cinderlella

2010-06-28T14:28:00.004+08:00

Sentosa with them was a nice way to end the weekend.
My whole body is aching. Prolly because we had some ball games yesterday and we didnt warm up before that heh heh.

Hooked

2010-06-26T14:08:00.005+08:00

Okay fine, i admit. Channing Tatum is 10 times hotter than Joe Jonas.
Oh, you... *melts*

Which part of a guy do you find sexy?
The eyebrows. Thick thick eyebrows like MF ♥

L.A Baby

2010-06-24T20:46:00.004+08:00

Youre the apple of my eye ♥
Excited for Jonas Season 2! Managed to watch 2/3 of their first episode and i can't wait for the rest of their episodes. Okay, back to studying!

I like it

2010-06-23T16:55:00.004+08:00

Isnt that just... Woahhhhhh. You knock me off my feet, Joe.
Chemistry tmr. Yayyyy not :(

Enrique's I like it music video makes me wanna dance all night!

Never say never

2010-06-22T21:03:00.004+08:00

Boy, I need you here with me
We can't go on this way
I'm falling hard for you
And all I can say

We're going round and round
We're never gonna stop

HEHE. Stole that picture (above) from boyfriend's facebook. I just think he looks damn charming here, with that bull behind him haha. He was at Shanghai for a school trip to see the World Expo. Awesome righttttttt :( Bummer. So anyway, met up with this buddy just now to watch Karate Kid. Watched it before with my mom and brothers but i still can't get enough of that adorable Jaden Smith, so yeaaaaa.

We only met up for the movie cause time wasnt on our side plus, he needs to study. It's nice to finally meet him! Okay boy, study hard and goodluck for your papers. Have fun studying! Speaking of which, i have to continue my revision too. Bleargh, but i'm too tired. I need to sleep but i don't want to

Go girl, seek happy nights to happy days.

2010-06-22T10:06:00.004+08:00

A guy and a girl can be just friends, but at one point or another, they will fall for each other...
Maybe temporarily, maybe at the wrong time, maybe too late, or maybe forever.

Sidetrack; Anatomy & Physiology = Biochem + Chem + Microbiology all together
Woaaaaaaaah. I'm really exhausted, i keep yawning in class these days. This has gotta stop. I better sleep early tonight. Seriously. I better brush off the thought of finding a job. I don't think i can cope. Soon maybe

The love

2010-06-21T00:44:00.004+08:00

What an old picture. Sigh, the good ol' days

There are so many things to say!
Let me just sum it up alright. Happy 2oth love ♥ Study hard, goodluck for your midyear papers okay. I promise i won't irritate you haha! Have fun studying sexy! Lots of love, your humunculus.

Oh yea, i love you daddy! Youre the greatest man ive ever met. I will study hard and make you proud. Take care of your health, please. I love you ;'(

Meet me halfway

2010-06-18T00:12:00.009+08:00

Meet me halfway, right at the borderline
That's where i'm gonna wait, for you
I'll be looking out, night and day
Took my heart to the limit, and this is where i'll stay

I can't go any further then this
I want you so bad it's my only wish

Time is gold, life is priceless

2010-06-15T20:03:00.007+08:00

A&P is over
This is not the end though, the worst has yet to come
UT2 in two weeks time, and PP
Oh boy.

Fatigue.

WC;
And all the best games were/will be aired at 2:30 in the morning! Unfair!

Life is short, study hard

2010-06-11T16:12:00.004+08:00

Trying to digest all 6 problems of A&P is really torturing. Plus, i couldnt take my mind off the fact that UT2 is just 25 days away! Im panicking yet im blogging? Oh, it's break time now haha. I wanted to eat but my family ate all of my roti john which i made early this afternoon. Actually, i kinda like this im-stressed-because-of-exams period. All i can and need to think of is just studies. Woohoo, two thumbs up for Ain! Hahaha

Okay back to mugging

Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we often might win, by fearing to attempt.

Cutie pie

2010-06-08T17:49:00.001+08:00

Aww i like what her daughter is wearing.

Dress 'em small daughters
with colourful tights and cute dresses

Not now

2010-06-04T15:56:00.004+08:00

Gee, i've lost the mojo to blog.
Damn, UT2 is just next month!

Sayonara

So sorry

2010-05-27T21:20:00.004+08:00

Addicted to Pringles, for now. Didnt know it was halal haha! Sweet and sour cream onion FTW! I know it may sound gross to you but, wtheck haha. After eating these junk food, must not forget to exercise. Jogging, swimming and working out this hols. And and and, IM NOT SKINNY LA! Tsk. Stupid weighing machine has no battery, i cannot check my weight. Bummer

I miss you :'(

I'm lost for words, not a good thing

2010-05-27T19:16:00.008+08:00

Back.
I'm certainly not happy yet but trying my best to be a strong girl.

Yea love stinks especially when one is unsure of the feelings, or unsure whether they should go on with the relationship. My mind said, Leave but the heart said, Stay. So which one should i actually listen to? Why is it so hard for me to just leave?

Wanna know what's stopping me? Him. Though it has been a year plus, my love for him is still strong. We've been through alot of shits but it's love man. Youve got to go through fucked up situations and all to see how strong the relationship is. We had great memories, it was just wonderful. So there were some fights in the middle but i have never stopped loving you syg. Till today, i keep blaming myself for what happened in the past. I'm really really sorry.

When i asked for it and obviously, it's not something that i want. I had to. It's all because of you. All you said was, youre unsure, you don't know. I wonder what the other girls would do if they were to hear such stupid answers from their boyfriends tsk. When i looked at you, i couldnt do it, i couldnt leave. My heart felt so heavy. Like, "What the hell am i doing?! I still love you!" But on the other hand, i don't want to live in misery anymore. I don't want to be the girl who is always upset because of this stupid thing called, Love. Like they say, It may not be what you want but this shit is not what you deserve. So should i sacrifice the love? Syg, youve got to fucking wake up! Stop your "don't knows". I know it's hard to make the decision but please, at least tell me what i'm suppose to do.

Sigh, the sad part is i still love you very much.

I’m tired of waiting for you, I’m sick of always falling for your words. I want to leave, but something about you keeps pulling me back in.

On a brighter note, THE HOLIDAYS ARE HERE! Kay, that is not something i'm excited about. Holidays are boring. No school, so money hahaha. Work? Easy for you to say. It's difficult when you have a dad like mine. Plus, i can't just apply for any job. Must look for the ones that will not affect his CPF? Aaaahh crap, whatever. I'm not gonna work now. Imma study first.

This June hols, i've planned to revise my modules And! Not to forget study for my A&P UT! Haha! There's a lot to study! *faints* Try to atleast do half or maybe a quarter of my PP. Meet up with this long lost buddy of mine, Refdee. I'm not sure if i got the time (or money). Like he said, "Mcm paham" Gathering with W64F. Balls, money again -.-"

Oh and didnt i say, i'm gonna open up a blogshop? ^^ Yes. Yes. Soon okay pretty people.
Goodnight

Goodbye world.

2010-05-18T11:39:00.006+08:00

"It's not about you being busy, it's about your feelings"

Friends, sorry if i have not been answering your questions about you know what. Okay but to clear things up haha, i'm still with him la! Hahahah! I'm just super tired of all the things that's happening. Just need some time alone. Like seriously, alone. Nah, don't wanna think about love. Sucks big time. I'm feeling terribly upset now. Thank god tomorrow is Wednesday. No school. Just wanna sit at home and mug for Microbiology. Nick J up there? Just to cheer me up haha.

I'm like in my own world now. I'm not doing anything for today's problem. Chemistry just adds more misery in my life. For now, i won't be active in blogging and even tumblr. Bye people.

Oh btw girls, my friend and i are planning to open up a blogshop pretty soon. Maybe during the June hols. Do check it out okay?

Goodbye world

Study? Ugghhhh

2010-05-16T11:34:00.004+08:00

Ahhh yes it's Sunday alr. Normally i would laze around but not today, gotta recap everything i've learnt for Chemistry and Microbiology. Damn. All i want now, some fries and nuggets. And i'll be happy.

Balls. School's tmr. Bye

Your eyes..

2010-05-15T12:57:00.001+08:00

I don't need a parachute
Baby, if I've got you
Baby, if I've got you
I don't need a parachute
You're gonna catch me
You're gonna catch if I fall
Down, down, down

I'll fall into you...

Hungry

2010-05-14T20:54:00.004+08:00

Sigh, i'm gonna be miserable next week. I won't be able to see the love of my life (HAHA!) after school because of UT. Chem is on Tues and Microbio is on Friday. Dammit! Friday is the only day that i get to meet him after school! Hahaha nvm. Make sure i see him every morning. Okay okay i sound like a despo -.-" Boyfriend, if you're reading this. Can i have nuggets in the morning please? :P Heh heh. Kay kidding. Imma ask my mom to buy more packets of nuggets. Two packets are not enough, seriously. And im craving for fries now, sighhhhh.

I am freaking hungry right now. Mom havent pulang yet. I called and she didnt answer. I keep having weird things running through my mind if i don't eat when i'm hungry, like.. like.. having ulcers in my stomach then i'll get stomach cancer. Please please, no ulcers no cancer :(

EH RABAK LAH! BORING NYE! RUMAH NO FOOD!
I'm gonna die of starvation...

Shiny nails

2010-05-13T19:03:00.006+08:00

Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky like shooting stars

I could really use a wish right now
wish right now
wish right now

When i see those graduates in school with their parents, feeling so happy and excited, i was wishing that i could fast forward. I really really can't wait to graduate from RP. Okay seriously, need to study freaking hard. Chemistry is demoralising me!
*okay okay shutup, i can do it*
Wah boyfriend is gonna like, graduate in a few months. Tsktsk :(
goodluck for Alvls ah bro

Wrist like steel

2010-05-12T16:41:00.003+08:00

And though it's been a long time
youre right back where you started from
I see it in your eyes
and now youre giving up the gun

On the wrong side

2010-05-11T08:57:00.007+08:00

I’m in one of those situations. A with or without situation. You can, but you can’t. You know you’d love to, but you’d hate for it to happen. So… what do you do?

I just want to sleep now
And my contact lens are really really dry
Ohhh wow, tomorrow is Wednesday
You know what it means ^^
I can sleep the whole day heh heh heh

I wanna try going out with red lipstick but haaaaaaah, i don't know why it feels weird. I've never use lipstick before! HAHAHAHA! Maybe, maybe i should try hehe.

Will we ever be the same again?

2010-05-10T12:15:00.011+08:00

www.fashiontoast.blogspot.comPretty Pictures

Every girl dreams of a happy love life.
18 months ago, i felt like i was the luckiest girl on Earth
Okay, so i am still lucky to have my baby
Only that,
Things are now different
Very different
Didnt expect we could be this way
When feelings start to fade, are we suppose to go our own way?
Wait. Should i wait?
What if it gets worse later?

Please god,
give me a sign or something
I'm so confused
I'm unhappy...

But still, i'm in love with a guy who has thick eyebrows and brown eyes ♥
I just hope everything will be back to normal after all this.

....

All we need to do now, is focus more on our studies.
Hell yea, imma study my ass off. My daily grades now are better than last year/last sem. I just wanna maintain it and hope to get a good GPA. I swear Chemistry is pissing me off. And of all UTs, Chemistry UT is the first one, on the 18th. *freaks out*
On a side note, IVE FINALLY MADE MY BUTTS ROUNDER AND FIRMER! HAHAHAHAHA! Girls, if you wanna make your butts rounder and firmer, please go check out youtube. I swear the vids there are really helpful. Really, i can feel the tightness in my butts hahahaha! There's one effective vid, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kq1HnakX5C8 The lady in the vid has gorgeous butts and abs hahaha. Nice hair too ^^

still love ya :'(

2010-05-10T09:05:00.003+08:00

Im on the verge of giving up baby,
lost hope.

Bye

2010-05-05T07:34:00.003+08:00

Im a loser
And im tired of everything

Chemistry is really a jerk.
Love hate thing
Totally broke.
Did something stupid and unhealthy but it kinda felt good, it felt nice
(But i swear i won't do it again)

FRIENDS, PLEASE ASK YOUR FRIENDS TO LIKE MY PICTURE!
PLEASEEEEEEEE, IM BEGGING YOU. PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

Reblogged!

2010-05-02T21:06:00.002+08:00

Shyukur created tumblr and got his first post reblogged. And he was so excited about it. HAHAHAHA Funny lah! So Jakun.

Birthday.

2010-05-02T18:19:00.005+08:00

Yeap that's my mom's cake. I intended to buy the mother's day 'limited edition' cake but unfortunately it's either made of yam or vanilla. My mom hates vanilla and yam sounds blearghhh. Okay sorry, hahaha i cannot imagine myself eating anything that has yam. There were so many chocolate cakes. I couldnt decide haha! Fickle minded. So boyfriend helped me out heh heh. He even helped to carry my mom's birthday gift. See, thats what boyfriends are for! HAHAHAHAHA! (Y) And yes, my surprise plan went pretty well. Awhh i just love surprising people. I feel so happy whenever i surprise people on their birthdays. Got her a small vase from her favourite shop, Country De Art at woodlands. Luckily my brothers and dad contributed too or else, i don't know where to find the money to buy my mom her birthday gift. Next, Dad's birthday!

Its tough when someone specials ignore you, but it's even tougher to pretend that you don't mind

When the grass was greener and your hair was longer.

2010-04-27T22:07:00.005+08:00

I don't know what's the story behind this song but i just can't stop listening to it. It has this groovy retro beat. Plus Nick baby's voice is so sexy hehehe. Job well done baby (Y) Haha! So tomorrow is my off day. Planned to study and i hope nothing is gonna distract me. Chemistry today was just blearghhhhhh. Some orbitals shizz. I was one of the slowest there to understand the whole concept. I need Chemistry tuition pronto! Sigh.

Oh yea, HAPPY BIRTHDAY IBU!
Will update about the birthday surprise in my next post. Apparently, my dad's laptop is abit sakit. Pissing me off.

Youre not sexy, this is ♥

2010-04-26T15:44:00.008+08:00

Now this is what i call sexy and hot! Especially Nick baby heh heh. Red shorts and Black sleeveless tee? Plus big biceps. Jackpot! Hahaha. I think ive fallen in love with you again, Nick hahahaha. Kkay sorry, perasan. Having a headache right now. I keep thinking about those sad moments. Need to move on. I'll just think about Nick lah okay.

Having a talk later on. I don't feel like going, especially with this headache but i've got to force myself. Need to earn more CE Points. Lame, i know. Okay will blog later again tonight, if i'm not ~~lazy~~ busy. Haha. Bye!

...

Okay so the talk today was basically about my course. Attachment here, attachment there. I'm so worried about my freaking modules, need to think about attachment and CE Points, tsk. I'm upset right now. Okay, i'm not really that upset. Just pissed. Someone just called me anorexic. Fvck you. I'm trying very hard to fight my metabolism okay dude. Just because i don't like that foodcourt, that does not mean i don't like to eat. What kind of theory is that? Scumbag.

Imma Science Student, i like

2010-04-25T20:49:00.002+08:00

There are so many things to do, so little time. Plus, im still on procrastination mode. HAHAHA That explains why i have little time, heh heh. Went out to WS Library this afternoon with Amin to look for my Biochem books but i couldnt even find one science related book. Bummer. I hate WS Library. They don't let you sit on the floor and they provide only a few seats. What.The.Hell. So headed to Macd with my green apple ice blend haha.

Tomorrow is Anatomy & Physiology. We're having our lesson in the lab. Yay! I just hope tmr's problem is not as bad as last week's. This module is freaking complicated! Can cry! I think imma continue my revision. Goodnight

Set me free

2010-04-23T22:09:00.003+08:00

Hi. Youre sexy
Drooooooooooolz

And yes to you mister, please don't perasan like fuck can? You are nice but it has been like four years dude, move onnnnnnnnn.

Stay

2010-04-23T09:58:00.002+08:00

I WANT MY FREAKING LAPTOP BACK!
Fujitsu perangai, tsk.

Im cold
I'm sleepy
Planned to sleep while listening to my ipod
But damn, boyfriend took it
Aisehhhhhhhh

Love you baby. Don't go anywhere

Take the risk

2010-04-13T13:58:00.001+08:00

Bye

2010-04-12T19:02:00.004+08:00

Last minute plans
and people who loves to what they call it.... 'paitao'? Whatever.
Seriously, it's getting on my nerve
Can i just pretend you dont even exist?
Fuck you.

Ever been so confused as to where you stand that you just want to stop giving a shit?

Humid afternoon

2010-04-11T14:22:00.004+08:00

Teehehe. Currently my desktop wallpaper. Unfortunately, Kevin's face is blocked but naahhh i don't mind haha! As long as there's Joe & Nick ♥ And the minis, just a motivation for me to study hard heh heh. Imma own one of you bitch. Haha!

I wanna go out and jog or just do some simple exercises but damn, the weather is so.... humid. Can't stand this sticky sweaty situation, bleargh. So to avoid perspiring, i'm sitting quietly in my room, sims-ing hahaha.

Oh yea, where can i buy a nice white earpiece like the ipods/iphones? Hmm, that is quite.. cheap too? Haha. School is just around the corner and my earpiece can't be used anymore. Well only the right piece is working. I don't like the feeling yknow, only one piece is working and the other one 'bisu'. It feels like.. sooner or later my left ear will go deaf. Hahaha okay bye.

School

2010-04-10T14:48:00.003+08:00

Almost everyone i know spent most of their time with their boyfriends. My boyfriend is busy like fvck. Sigh Sigh Sigh. And i spent most of my hols at home, rotting. Well school's gonna start in a few days. I'm not really looking forward to it hahahaha hmm, i'm sick of making new friends and i'm tired of stupid misunderstandings among them. Bummer.

When you're quiet, they'll say Why uh she don't want to talk to us?
When you're loud and friendly, Why is she so irritating?
Well, i always fall under the quiet category -.-" Haaaaaaah you guys should know. I'm either shy or too lazy to entertain (: Heh heh

Checked my modules and woahhhhhhhhhhhh hahahah, there's Anatomy and Physiology, Chemistry II, Microbiology and Biochemistry. Chemistry? Ah sianz. HAHA! It's okay, i better not procrastinate and study more like i usually do. Easier said than done huh heh heh. I was actually quite surprised when there was only 4 modules. Then i realised, I DON'T NEED TO RETAKE ANY MODULES! WOOOHOOOOOO! I'VE GOT FREE WEDNESDAYS! Hahaha. Freaking happy! Atleast i can use the Wednesdays to study. Yessa!

I miss you mohamed fadhil :|

Okay. move on to a better day

2010-04-09T20:30:00.005+08:00

Never dwell on the past and don’t allow the future to scare you, because it will crush the happiness of your present.

ORIANTHI \m/

You You You.

2010-04-09T13:29:00.004+08:00

Marina Barrage with the girls was fantastic. Tried to fly a kite. First few attempts was unsuccessful cause we didnt know the direction of the wind at first but after awhile, we managed to let the kite fly. Unfortunately the string was too short so it couldnt fly as high as the other kites there. Shar's cookies were delicious. If only my jaw was alright, i could have finished up all of her cookies MWAHAHAHA! We played Dog & Bone and swear it was Freaking hilarious. The last time i played this game was.. Secondary School i think? HAHAHA! Then we had dinner at CS.

Zanessa

2010-04-07T23:47:00.000+08:00

I love this picture, alot
So much love ♥

:(

2010-04-06T17:47:00.000+08:00

It’s hard to hold a lot in. But for me, it’s sometimes even harder to let it all out.

You Rock \m/

2010-04-05T20:51:00.005+08:00

CLASH OF THE TITANS; two thumbz up

Mister fadhil didnt have the time to properly celebrate my eighteenth birthday so he decided to do it bit by bit. First was Pastamania, second was Clash of the Titans. Next would be my present, i think haha. Can't wait! Okay so maybe this year's birthday wasnt as 'big' as last year's but it's the thought that counts right? Every little thing is special. Wishes from friends and family, are enough to make myself happy. (Though someone let me down. Felt really upset but heck, now i don't care. This actually proves what kind of a 'friend' you are. No more chances.) I know it's kinda late haha, thank you very much for those mini celebrations. With Family, Gabriel and Lee, The Sixteen and of course boyfriend ♥ Awesome people! Heh heh.

Okay back to Clash of the Titans. It's freaking AWESOME! Fuck yea the hero's hot! Haha! Thanks for the treat syg. (Half god, half man -.-")

While i'm typing, i can't stop looking at my fingers. Mannnn, is it just me or my fingers are getting fatter and shorter? Eeeeehhhhh hahahaha! Well it used to look pretty long :| Need to start exercising my fingers hahaha. I don't want fatter fingers -.-, need fatter arms. That's all haha, I think my body size is just right hahaha, cause i can't seem to fit into my dress and the jeans which used to be so loose that it kept dropping while i walk is now, alright. Or am i still skinny and last few months, i was way skinnier? Omg :/ Tskkkkkkkk.

I'll be making a trip to the Or-tho-don-tist tmr (: I'm so excited about it! Haha Maybe because i can't wait to change my braces' colour Hahaha. Excitez Excitez haha!

Sweet Dreams

2010-04-02T23:43:00.003+08:00

ɹǝʇsıɯ ɐʎ ǝʌoן ı

haha fvcking cool!

Boyfriend ♥

2010-04-02T19:49:00.003+08:00

Boyfriend wanted to study at the National Library. Silly us, the library was closed cause of Public Holiday. So we made our way to Plaza Singapura to have our lunch. Pastamania baby! Heheh. Well, he treated me today. Happy la cause i get to save money to buy my high cuts. Unfortunately when we wanted to head home, i had to top up my ezlink! Ughhhhh, i was so freaking pissed. $10 gone, just like that! Singapore mcm toot lah! Why must i pay $10?! Why can't we just stick to $5? Ughhhhhhh.

Oooooh, Ugly Betty last 5 episodes are out alr! Yay! Marc ♥

Nick J

2010-04-01T14:27:00.001+08:00

Boy you make me go crazy

School

2010-04-01T01:12:00.002+08:00

(See that ring? I lost it during the Harper's Bazaar Photography Awards Photoshoot. Pfft)

Mom bought me another ring today. I love it! Thanks bu.

Oh boy, why do i miss you so much? I don't wanna miss you, don't wanna wait. I wanna be like you, Busy Busy Busy. School in a few weeks. I have mixed feelings about it. I'm excited and not really... excited. Hmm, you should know how this feeling is like.

go little bubbles, go

2010-03-31T21:24:00.003+08:00

(Okay just so you know, that thing i'm holding is 'Superman'. Filled with soap i guess)

Wow, my hair is long huh hahaha! Finally! I used to have short tomboy-ish hair when i was a lil kiddo till early secondary school haha, cause there's this old saying that it's 'hard' to study when your head is heavy with hair. HAHAHAHAHA! Cute right, i know. Well apart from that, i tend to get rashes around my neck so it'll be so itchy. It was just so embarrassing when you have red scars on your neck, behind the legs, hands. I couldnt stand the pain. Thank god those rashes day are over. Well i didnt quite believe that old saying anyway so i pleaded my parents to have long hair hahah. At least make me look girlish la. Now that my hair is long, i'm happy! I love you, hair.

I wanna fly some kites. Anyone wanna join? Or just blow bubbles to relax