Its not over
I cant think straight right now. Its either the results that will be released tmr or this new problem that's bugging me. Or is it just both? I'll just have to wait for whats gonna happen tmr and go easy with it. I have butterflies in my stomach and my head's spinning. My heart is palpitating far more worse than wildly. Or wtv it is. Right now, i've got nothing to cling on. No one to talk to abt my recent problem cs they will not be able to help. Advices. Advices. Advices. Its just piercing my eardrums. I want answers. Real answers. Thank you Meera for the advice, really appreciate it alot but im clueless. I Really dont know what to do. Should i leave him? Its hard. This is torturing. I cant do it. I cant leave him. I wont be able to accept the fact that i have to leave someone whom i love dearly. This is absurd. Even right now as i pour out whats bugging my mind, i dont know if you wld be able to understand all these words. Cs whenever im feeling low, whatever i say, whatever i write, whatever i type, it wont come out right. This feeling sucks. I hate it. I know syg, two months or how many months idk, things will be normal, just like what you said. But right now, sorry to say, what they said.. it hurts me. I was torn apart. Its like as if they were blaming me for starting all this relationship. For starting this bloody stupid situation. Of course, they looked fine aft what had happened. But why do they have to call me, again? Yes, i was warned and one call is enough. I understand. The second call pulled me down. What? You have their support and stuff like that.. You dont need me now, you dont need someone special. I was speechless. Yes! I understand that its not the right time for you. Yes! I understand that your studies are far more impt right now. What abt me? My parents support me too. My family, to be exact. Yeah, studies are much more impt even for me but you said you cant leave me, not now. You think i can leave you, just like that? And look for another guy to replace you? If we were to be separated, im not gonna find another guy. Serious. I dont know whats gonna happen with us and it aint easy for me to forget you. I'm not blaming your folks okay. I'm not blaming you either. I just dont want to blame anyone for this problem. Should we just go our separate ways? And if we were to continue, will we be the same again? Will this problem rise again? Honestly, im scared. And if i have to wait for you, will the feelings in us towards each other be the same again? I dont know. Seriously, i dont know. I dont want my folks to know. Please. From what i know, i love you so much. It hurts to let you go. Sorry people, if you find this post disgusting or lovey dovey, you wld have go on to other blogs and not read it till the end. Im just letting it all out. And im feeling abit better right now, i think. Im even not sure abt myself. Its hard to describe. Falling in love is easy, letting you go is hard. Youve made the decision. You dont want to let me go. But as for me, i really dont know. Im stuck. I'll not be able to make the decision this time.
No comments:
Post a Comment